I even don't try to explain it to myself - so this is intimate... only God knows... how It has survived? he killed all my pure life with him, all my hard life with him, all our 'childrenand women and youth' and all the city was ruined, but how This the uppermost desire go on living?
Indeed what was in the beginning... In the beginning there was terrible desire, strong lust... Now all feeling passed away - I still hate him as nobody else, but I do want him, terribly.
How can I rest? Sex with me is not a field he discuss gladly... I even don't know if he still keeps my photos or threw them all,
so I would be have rest only with this Presence of things I love in him most of all...
In the bathroom, I think about how he could fit to it.. and frighten a bit that it is not so big mightbe, and start crying from it. Then I laugh because it is the stupid reason to despair becasue of the bath - my bed is good enough and big for two. But not for three!
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How can I rest and from what?
I even don't try to explain it to myself - so this is intimate... only God knows... how It has survived? he killed all my pure life with him, all my hard life with him, all our 'childrenand women and youth' and all the city was ruined, but how This the uppermost desire go on living?
Indeed what was in the beginning... In the beginning there was terrible desire, strong lust... Now all feeling passed away - I still hate him as nobody else, but I do want him, terribly.
How can I rest? Sex with me is not a field he discuss gladly... I even don't know if he still keeps my photos or threw them all,
so I would be have rest only with this Presence of things I love in him most of all...
In the bathroom, I think about how he could fit to it.. and frighten a bit that it is not so big mightbe, and start crying from it. Then I laugh because it is the stupid reason to despair becasue of the bath - my bed is good enough and big for two. But not for three!
No, not now. Now I want him
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